Sunshine Too Brief


All Contents copyright of
Tazzy at

I'm a self-absorbed Bengali-Torontonian;
Fish comes to me raw, wrappend in seaweed, not cooked in curry;
I love watching thunderstorms and rain;
Sad endings make more sense to me than happy ones;
I hate empty walls.

In the News

Craving of the week-
Dark Chocolate
Reading List-
Midnight's Children
Movie review(out of 5)-
127 hours- *****
Buried- ****
That Girl in Yellow Boots- **
Love of the week-
Seeing James Franco
Aim for the weekend-
Watch 'Going Postal' The Movie

My Novella: Samosa for the Arranged Souls

Introduction & Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapters 3, 4 & 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 6 continues

Chapter 7 & Epilogue

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    Coffee talks

    Rereading Jingo and came across this quote....almost died laughing.
    "They say they want a soulmate and helpmeet but sooner or later the list would include a skin like silk and a chest fit for a herd of cows."-- (Terry Pratchett, Jingo)

    Its true. Talk to somone over the age of 20 for five minutes and invariably you find yourself talking about the qualities about his/her partners/future or prospective partners. If its someone of southasian origin and going the 'arranged way' - this basically means the 'boy/girl' his/her parent's think will qualify as a 'catch'. Much as they like to huff and argue otherwise, men out there have it easy. They have simple requirements- if the girl is good looking and/or she is giving some out (don't deny it, a guy will follow a girl to any alter with 'the possibility of s_x in near future' dangled as a carrot/celery etc). Its more complicated for girls...or we deliberately make it so. Quite fascinating to hear are all the requirements we girls try to put forth for prospective life partners....much of which are self contradictory. Some of the ones I've heard so far-
    "He has to be bangali and good looking" - eenggggh. bengali guys are not good looking
    "He has to be extremely rich and educated" - umm a degree is not necessarily the path to riches or vice versa
    "He has to be western enough to not embarress me in front of my friends but eastern enough to pay for everything/get along with my family etc"- this is a biggie for most.........and equaly impossible to detect in the first 10 meetings.
    Many people (read mothers/aunties) will tell you that finding a combination of all of the above, is next to impossible and accuse you of being too damn picky.
    Excuse me! Its not a piece of furtuniture I'm picking; its choosing a someone who'll share your house, your bathroom and if he is good at it- your bed, FOR LIFE , not to mention will contribute to the genes of your future kids. You have every right to take your time.
    What's sad is when people don't. From many of the relationship I have seen start and end, its seems, to me atleast, that people don't really weigh in their decision to date/or even marry someone. They let their hormones and/or need for a companion/security/freedom take over, proclaim 'oh I'm in love' and pick/shack up with someone that they are clearly at odds with to begin with.
    If I could, on hand, count the number of times I've heard people cite the excuse of ' religions/cultural/economic differences' for a break-up, I would have to grow extra limbs.
    For gawd sake why did you choose him/her in the first place!
    If you hate smoking, don't date a smoker and expect him/her to give it up for you just because they love you.
    If you don't have the courage to cross barriers or stand up to your parents, don't waste your friend's time, moaning about unrelinquished love.
    Love is not fucking blind- you are....not you, the person behind you. :)
    Now before you all (and i know the ones who will) rush to comment on how 'bitter' all of this makes me sound, hear me out. Ready?
    Naively optimistic perhaps, not bitter.
    I don't hate all men. I hate a lot of women too! lol....... like the stupid ones who want to be lead around by their men and the scary ones who string men along with games and false hopes.
    I'm not shopping around waiting for the 'perfect man' either- only because there is nothing called perfect.
    I've met reasonably compatible men (okay fine, two of them, but still) , you know the quiet-honest-smart-interesting sort with (as my friend Ayesha would say) definite 'possibilities of progress' . And I'm not talking crushes. I'm talking about the real deal. eeeek not the sexual kind either.
    Anyway as I was saying, the fact that they happen to be committed someone else...when I met them, is obviously not my fault or bad karma.
    We women outnumber men these days after all. :)
    The point is.......fuck whats the point again?
    ahem......surely being 26 and single doesn't mean I'm 'on the shelf' , on the counter maybe, not shelf. hehe.

    PS: update on last post, no accidents on the salsa floor......serious crush on two of the guys there though. :D


    At 9:48 p.m., January 20, 2005, Blogger Anokhi said...


    very nicely put!!!
    You forgot to add that as a south asian girl gets older, her expected list of things to look for in a mate are supposed to get smaller until the day comes that she says yes to the next remotely male thing that proposes to her!!!!

    I could add my own huge long post to this but I won't...I've decided to stop bitching about this topic as much as possible. let's see how long that lasts! :P

    At 9:31 a.m., January 21, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

    hHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHAh ditto what sadz said :)

    i'mi n bangkok - rekindling my fasciantion of hot young Canadian/English boys (gawd there are so many of them ehre --) i had almsot forgotten how goodlooking someof them can be! man - u live in a brown country for 3 months and u start thinking that maybe they're not as ugly as u thought they are.....

    At 7:51 a.m., August 16, 2005, Blogger Kazi Rubaiat Imam said...

    interesting.. hmmm...

    At 2:01 a.m., February 14, 2007, Blogger adi said...

    bengali men, not good-looking. gotta be kidding me lady.
    I am Bengali and has been told by countless women that I'm cute and a real hot guy (and No I don't live in a small town in India. lived in London, New York, Chicago).
    If a women who rates 4 (scale of 10) starts expecting Leonardo DiCaprio look alikes then isn't there a real need for serious revaluation.


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