Sunshine Too Brief


All Contents copyright of
Tazzy at

I'm a self-absorbed Bengali-Torontonian;
Fish comes to me raw, wrappend in seaweed, not cooked in curry;
I love watching thunderstorms and rain;
Sad endings make more sense to me than happy ones;
I hate empty walls.

In the News

Craving of the week-
Dark Chocolate
Reading List-
Midnight's Children
Movie review(out of 5)-
127 hours- *****
Buried- ****
That Girl in Yellow Boots- **
Love of the week-
Seeing James Franco
Aim for the weekend-
Watch 'Going Postal' The Movie

My Novella: Samosa for the Arranged Souls

Introduction & Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapters 3, 4 & 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 6 continues

Chapter 7 & Epilogue

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    The problem within

    Finally, something proactive by the morderate Muslims in Canada as they get together to strongly denounce extremism.

    Maybe the Muslim leaders are realizing that the war waged by the fundamentalist Muslims is not only against the West, its against all morderate muslims and that it IS a Muslim Problem.
    Meaning its time the Muslim communties all over the world and not only in US, take a hard look at how and where the terrorism is arising from in the 'niche of unique cultural identity' that they have created by thinking all Western views and values are wrong and unIslamic.

    Its just not enough to say 'killing innocent people is wrong' when the innocent are killed in the name of your God and the perpetrators are claiming to belong to your faith.
    As the saying goes, there is never a fire without smoke. The Muslim leaders know where the smoke is coming from, they need to douse it out. Any mosque where extremist teachings are presented even on a theoretical level using the excuse of the happenings in Palestine and Iraq, those Imams must be expelled. Wahabism (the monachical teachings propogated by the leaders in Saudi Arabia) must stopped along with this idea that any moderations to the Islam is wrong. Just as Islam adapted a little when it reached the South-Asian countries like Bangladesh, it too must adapt itself to the West, something that was already starting I think with the scholars in the West who encouraged cross-faith discussions to draw on their similarities .

    'War on Terror' might a fancy media invention that immediately puts the face of 'G. Bush and his political agenda' in our minds (Muslim and non-Muslims alike), but that doesn't make it unreal. If you keep track the occurances in South Asia you'll notice that the terror started there even before the Sept 9/11 occured in NY. I draw your attention to the attacks on Shia mosques and Shia processons in Pakistan that has only been increasing in frequencey and the suicide bomb attacks on the Bengali New year's cultural celebrations on April 14 2001 in Bangladesh. There has been subsequent bombing in both of these Muslim countries where Islam was used as an excuse.

    Extremist and purist thinkings had started a war for some time now.
    The leaders cannot wait till the next teenager in the West, even Canada (which is on the list) decides that killing himself and others in the name of God will glorify him, they must talk now and stop pointing finger at the West and Israel for all their problems.


    Chili flakes in my brain

    What is it about hot spices that turns my well-oiled supposedly-logical brains into dhal-bhorta?
    I can't stop thinking about it.......the death-by-spice seafood stir fry at the Thai place in Victoria,BC that I had in June!
    Never has the combo of plump shrimps, fresh scallops and interesting shellfish tossed with a mug full of hot chili pepper paste and sprinkled with veggies on a bed of rice has taken over the mind like this. (Supported by a bucket full of water ofcourse)

    You must have that feeling sometime right?
    When you just know that your tongue might try to kill itself by choking on its own saliva if you don't feed it what you've been craving for days: fuchka (pani-puri), mac&cheese, vanilla ice-cream topped with hot fudge brownies, a McChicken...whatever it maybe .
    shiteblimeyholytoodles am I the only freak?
    tell me it isn't so.
    Oh I hate people for whom food is just to fill the stomach!
    What about your mind, you fool?
    Darn it. Where is the magic carpet when you need it? Coz the TO Thai food just won't cut it. I need to get to BC.

    Oh well maybe the 'Hot and spicy food festival' at the Harbourfront this weekend will placate Ms. T for a bit, even if its not Thai spice that are featured.
    Who's with me?


    Aaji rimi jhimi mukhorito badole din

    "Aji rimi jhimi mukhorito badole din
    Janina kichutey kanoje mono lagey na"

    Paper Boats by Rabindranath Tagore

    Day by day I float my paper boats one by one down
    the running stream.
    In bid black letters I write my name on them and
    the name of the village where I live.
    I hope that someone in some strange land will find them and
    know who I am.
    I load my little boats with shiuli flower from our garden, and
    hope that these blooms of the dawn will be carried safely to land
    in the night.
    I launch my paper boats and look up into the sky and see the
    little clouds setting thee white bulging sails.
    I know not what playmate of mine in the sky sends them down
    the air to race with my boats!
    When night comes I bury my face in my arms and dream that my
    paper boats float on and on under the midnight stars.
    The fairies of sleep are sailing in them, and the lading ins
    their baskets full of dreams.


    The weekend in pictures

    Saturday Brunch after friday night at the Madison


    Escaping the sun with a saturday afternoon movie - The Island


    At my sister's Sunday lunch party:



    Position available

    With the changing situations at the Homefront where Mrs Mother has gone from cajoling to blackmailing to outright threatening her spinster daughter, a position has opened up.

    If this daughter is not married to some Muslim guy (she is 'permitted' to bring a Pakistani guy *horror*) by next August, all before her good little religious doctor cousin gets engaged, she will apparently be seeing Mrs Mother's dead face.
    So this is an urgent call to all single guys out there.
    If you want to save the life of a 40 something, attractive, slightly dramatic Bengali mother who is a great cook and will buy gold chains for all her son-in-laws (*shudder*), apply now.
    Applicant must be
    - virile
    - a Bengali Muslim
    - able to sign his name
    - from a nice family who like to keep their woman on a leash (because nothing would please her more than seeing the daughter stay home all the time),

    Come by the nearest mosque in Toronto on July 30th 20006 for a 5 minute ceremony of Kabools (I do s).
    Please bring a 'Biodata' and digital camera so that proofs can be provided to Mrs Mother.
    Apply now and don't let forever bind you together.
    Please note that applicant is allowed a leave of absence of 'eternity' from married life starting the same day following a wedding band exchange ceremony.

    Please summarize your qualifications in your application and leave it in the Comment box.

    Thank you.

    (*Off to shave skin and dunk entire body in 100% bleach so no trace of 'south-asianness' remains, followed by a s_x change*
    Think it'll work?)

    Fukcing cowards

    I leave to see the baby(who's smiline now) for one day and what happens?
    another event in London! no fatalities this time thank goodness
    Moreover they ran away .......meaning there willl be witnesses.
    You're not going far you bastards!

    Read what the bloggers there are saying its far more interesting than BBC Nosemonkey: "@ 14:14pm - more reports of the bomber at Oval being a fuc*ing p*ssy,dumping his bag (big black rucksack) and legging it. These guys arepathetic. If you're going to blow us up at least have the guts to blowyourself up too."
    Did I mention how I love those British? funny funny people :)
    More from Nosemonkey whose blaming the right wing political party (BNP; they mabe the same as the BNP-Bangladesh Nationalis Party in BD )

    and Tim Worstall:


    Not an excuse

    The heat is still on .....but is that an excuse for a girl of size 16 to try and squish her bum into a size 6 mini skirt and complete the look with a matching tube top with no reinforcements?
    Honestly people; this blogger is all for positive body image for every woman, but you must really do your part and look at yourself in the mirror before stepping out in public so that the rest of the world doesn't have to run home to wash the image of flattened-elongated-bum-with-wobbly-lovehandles-sticking out-of-a-micro-mini out of their eyes.

    Speaking of needing a visual gag, Dr. Quinn (TV show about a headstrong female doctor in a small wild west town) will never be the same for me after having watched the 'Wedding Crashers' this weekend . I'm sure Jane Seymore was itching to get out of the chaste long skirts and frilled blouses but did she have to strip down like that just to get Owen Wilson to grab her boobies?


    Please take my sunshine away

    I got tanned today.
    at 9am in the morning to be precise.
    from walking to work for twenty minutes .
    There is tank-top shaped tan line on my neck and shoulders right now.
    Yes, people. I've been reduced to wearing tank-tops, that flaunts my eggplanty arms, all because of how annoyingly hot it's been for the past couple of weeks. Thankgoodness everyone else is wearing even less clothes so I don't stand out.
    Its hot.
    But I'm supposed to not complain about that , because I happen to have grown up in the middle-east. Sure it was hotter there(50 degrees Celsius anyone?), but we had airconditioning EVERYWHERE that was NEVER turned off to save any power anywhere and we only stepped out of the air-conditioned arena to cool off by the (real) beach. We don't really have that option here in toronto do we? No the beach by the lake doesn't count if it doesn't bring in cool air.

    While everyone started a month ago, I had put off whinnying about the heat, remembering that walking in the heat is much better than sliding on iced sidewalks in winter.
    But now I'm just sick of it.
    I want :
    A cooled apartment.
    A less fussy cat.
    More toned arms.
    And most of all, the monsoons-
    ..........the growling thunder, the flooded streets, the cleansed terraces, rain protection sheets in the rickshaw that will still soak you to the bones, music drifting out of open windows...."Esho neepo boney chayabeethi toley esho koro snan nobodhara joley"....and the smiles on the faces of the children who have rushed outside to welcome it.

    Yes sure, its really clouding up outside right now. But its all a pretense. We won't get the breeze that will cool you to your toes or the hour-long downpour to soak up the humid air or even the sweet smell of the earth being kissed by rain.
    It will be a 'nothing rain.'


    Fringe 2005 review 4, 5 & 6

    Jolly Roger: Weird, wacko, totally unpredictable are some of the words that comes into my mind thinking about this particular performance by Jonno Katz from Australia. On print its a puppet show but somewhere along the line it diverged into 'sappy' jokes about trees, two scorpions having an argument; even Jesus made an appearance- first as a sperm and then as a waiter. If a combo of all of the above rocks your world- go watch it. For everyone else like me, once you throw out any expectations of intelligence or coherence of story from this particular play, its quite funny a weird 'pincy' sort of a way.

    An Unfortunate Woman: This play was recommended to me by my ex-supervisor from work who I keep running into at various fringe shows! Nicola Gunn from Australia is definitely not unfortunate like the characters she plays, as the evening(8:30pm) show I went to was completely sold out in 10 minutes, an hour before it even started. I was expecting a funny play but it turned out to be the saddest thing I've seen on the Fringe so far(which by itself is not much as I only watched comedy). Its one wo(man) acting out a number of characters (male, female,young, old, even a dog) that are seemingly interconnected by one tramedic story of self-discovery on a rainy day in an unspecified place where everyone speaks with an accent. It was obvious that Ms Gunn is a very talented actress and is likely to go far. She did throw in a few funny scenes which made it all worthwile for me. Warrning: The Glen Morris theatre is not air-conditioned, but the Fringe staff were wonderful enough to provide hand held fans and free Freezies for everyone attending the show. Extra tip for the Fringe !:)

    Death of a Vacuum Cleaner Salesman: This was also a recommendation, by Erika -the producer of the show who I ended up chatting to while lining up to see Jolly Roger. A most congenial woman who later graciously invited this science geek to the sunday night band performance at the Fringe club where all the performers hang out (yey! finally I'm cool!). Anyway back to the reveiw. DVCS is only 30 minutes long and is a take on Arthur Miller's classic play- Death of a Salesman, performed beautifully by Rob Monk & Peter Treadwell. No, I haven't read the play either, but having watched this version, I'm likely to get someone to read one of Miller's plays to me in future. It was hilarious. A true depiction of what the public thinks of telemarketers and the ways we try to avoid talking to them at any cost- even if it means killing the soul-sucking beasts. Cheers to Peter for portraying the beast with such endearing sincerity.

    Sigh: My 5-play pass for the Fringe is all used up and I haven't had my fill yet :( . Bah. That it one more on Thursday.


    Its not my fault that I feel like screaming sometimes...

    If I have to hear it one more time from the next Pakistani-Canadian person I run into, I swear I'm gonna hit someone... with a Hilsha fish maybe .
    "Oh are you from Bangladesh?" Immediately followed by " You must know Urdu."
    Err....Excuse me? How is that even a logical question?!
    Depending on my mood, I usually reply with a forced confused look
    "No, I know Hindi. Is it the same?" or
    smiling ever so sweetly "No. Do you know Bangla?" .
    You could ignore the person if it ended there , but no; he/she has to add "Why not?" or worse "You must hate it how India made Bangladesh separate from Pakistan. Bangladesh would have been prosperous like us if we 'brothers' stayed together".

    Shock and awe.
    How can seemingly educated and logical people originating from that country STILL know so little about the events of 1971?!
    I mean they can't even claim the 'media blanket' as a reason for cluelessness(where the West Pakistan media failed to report on what was happening in Dhaka in 1971, on purpose) , like their parent's generation. All they have to do is 'Google' the words - Bangladesh war, 1971 or even East Pakistan- and voila! You have facts. YES FACTS! Not conspiracy theories of how India instigated the Bangalis to revolt or that 'only a few people died' (try 300,000 by your government's count you morons) in combat ; but actual sequence of events. And they don't even have to go the seemingly Bangladeshi sites.

    Had it not been for some close Pakistani friends of mine and one book (Kartography by Kamila Shamsie), I would have continued thinking that everyone from there must be utterly blind and stupid, not unlike the American public that they are so fond of criticizing.
    Its not like I'm unwilling to let the past be past or am against unity among the South-Asian people but I'm sick of the ignorance of these people about their own (past) government 's involvement in the planned mass genocide of their own people. How can you possible learn lessons from the past if you don't even know the past?

    But hey, the Bengalis are not better eh? If the people from West Pakistan are mistaken in giving all the credit of the 1971 war to India, the liberated Bangladeshi people, I will accuse, of not giving enough credit to India, specifically the Indian army. Even today, there are fears of 'selling the country to India' or 'India taking over Bangladesh' among the equally educated and logical Bengali people instead of endorsing in building even the smallest monument to acknowledge the Indian soldiers who died then- not defending their own country but helping another. We are not even going to mention all the underground 'West-Bengalis' (Bengali people living in India) who helped train the 'guerilla forces' to fight before India got involved. And as for the 'looking for India's motive to help Bangladesh in 1971', people just need to chill out. If it wanted, India would have 'taken over' Bangladesh AGES ago instead of turning it into its major black market exporter country (or what ever the technical term might be). India has its own blood smeard past (and current) issues to deal with before taking in Bangladesh.

    Final thoughts: Considering world politics is not that dissimilar to school playground politics, I don't think its that childish to ask for the three current leaders to meet sometime and shake hands while
    - Pakistan says 'Sorry' to Bangladesh
    - Bangladesh says 'Thanks' to India
    - and India says 'Peace, man' to Pakistan
    ......maybe then we'd stop hearing stupid comments from stupid people.
    Or not.


    Fringe 2005 review 2 and 3

    Phew. Two plays in the same night. Good thing the venues were close by. Here it goes.

    Articulate - First of all, the name. very misleading that one. Is it an english lesson? well sort of. It is on one level about what we mean to say but don't say it exactly how we meant to could say 'nice' but you could also say something more explanatory like 'refreshing'. We lack articulation at times, depending on circumstances/state of mind/age etc. The play is actually a well acted romantic comedy not involving annoying the third characters or last-minute-chase-scenes... normally associated with the romantic comedy genre. Its about the nuisances of waiting for the first call or the lull in the first date conversation, all packaged in a sweet, intelligent and real love story. And Cayman Duncan is just TOO cute.

    Cheapskate- again...the name. You know its going to be funny but whats it about? people being cheap or people coming across cheap. Its the second one- i.e. appearances. Notably first impressions. Actually three first the lives of three room-mates. Its about the mordern dating scene and the story could easily be out of an episode of 'Friends', but the story goes deeper into the skeletons of the characters- what they think of others and themselves. Do we always know whts best for our friends, for ourselves? Go watch and find out. A guy or a girl, you'll be seeing yourself or your best friend on stage.
    Best acting out of a troup of 9 people I have seen at the Fringe so far.

    Common thread for both: Use of deliberate mistakes in the presentation- Spilled water. A slip of tongue. A cocky smirk from the people moving the furniture around on stage. Very clever. It draws the audience into the raw nature of theatre and involves them in a more personal way.



    Lets have a round of applause for the citizens of London for their remarkable calm and restraint in times of what must have been an absolute horror and a fervent wish of 'No more'.


    Fringe 2005 review 1

    Last night we saw this year's first Fringe show titled "The Slip Knot" written and performed by TJ Dawe; Sadiya and I laughed so much that our sides still hurt.
    Brilliant. Just brilliant.
    Background: Many of last year's Fringers will remember the show 'One Man's Lord of the Rings' which was a huge hit (that is one man, acting out the 9 hour LOTR trilogy by himself with no props, in an hour). It turns out that TJ had directed it.
    This time, its him juggling three hilarious tales about crappy jobs (as a truck driver for a dumpster company, lost parcel tracker for Canada Post and a Shoppper's Drug Mart shelf-stocker) intermixing it with annecdotes and rants about euphamisms in advertising (like naming the condom isle at Shopper's as 'family planning'), bad 80s music on Shoppers radio (which reminded me of the Walmart radio....*shudder*..oh how I hated Shania in those months), failed relationships, doing acid, driving in Canadian winter, the elderly and childhood ideals we all had about what kind of jobs we would do when we grew up.
    He received a 5 minute standing ovation at the end of the show for his first performance of this year.
    So make note- 'The Slip Knot'.
    Check it out if you are in Toronto. Spread the word.
    I've atleast five more shows that I'd be seeing this year and will be reviewing them as the days progress.

    For those of you with no idea what I'm talking about here is a bit of a history on the 'Fringe movement in North America'
    "The first, and largest, Fringe in Canada is the Edmonton Fringe Festival which was established in 1982. Hoping to provide a direct link between theatre artists and their audiences the festival adapted a simple formula that was created by the Edinburgh Fringe Festival over 50 years ago. The main principles were to provide all artists, emerging and established, with the opportunity to produce their play no matter the content, form or style, and to make the event as affordable and accessible as possible for the members of the community."

    All the proceeds from the shows go directly to the performer, for many of whom 'Fringe' is the only source of living. Considering how expensive mainstream theatre has become (the LOTR musical will be going for atleast $100 even through Mirvish) now, Fringe (which charges a measly $10 per show) IS best way to inject of bit of arts in your life these days.

    'Theatre under the Stars' at High Park ( this year's feature- Shekespeare's'Much Ado About Nothing' ) looks quite promising too as well as the free movie screenings of Grease,West Side Story, Chicago and other musicals on Dundas square every tuesday till August.

    Ah love the summer times in TO! :D .
    Time to hit the streets.

    Snapshots part 2

    A man in a black suit and tie crosses the street while munching on a raw red cabbage for breakfast. *erm I suppose its healthy...still yuck*

    A woman in a flowery(pink and yellow hibiscus) print shirt and skirt walks into the hospital carrying a matching flowery(pink and yellow hibiscus), birdy(green parrots), glittery(pink) bag. *awww*

    Somewhere else a bus is peeled open from the inside and sits among blue/red flashing lights like a blossomed tin flower.
    *40 deaths and counting....*

    (Snapshots part 1)


    Virus alert

    Warning to men: Read at own risk.

    Listen up singletons.
    Frustrated with dating Mr Wrong?
    Wondering whats wrong? if its you? the guy? your shoes/perfume/the salad you ordered at the first date? or the City you are at?
    There seems to a virus abound.

    The virus is named EFS- emotional fukcwittage syndrome.
    and its affecting males from the age of 18-33.

    Symptoms include
    -a tendency to be overtly dramatic and intense on the first date when flowery proses sprout from lips unabashedly
    - then being all impassive on the second date but continuing to make plans for future dates
    - beginning the conversation along the lines of 'I like you....but I don't know....*cough cough* you see there is this girl I liked when I was like 15....and we are all wrong/she was horrible to me ....but I still love her....etc you think I did the right thing...erm....what do you want ' on the third date
    - then playing dead (i.e. not returning calls) or writing confusing emails/leaving errant messages or proceeding to pick an argument all the while making you feel guilty for winning it
    - finally ending it in the famous 'lets be friends' line, the message behind which is that he knows he is being an as*hol* but he rather you not say it to his face or to your friends in case he wants to date any one of them

    Not a symptom
    -Honesty or common courtesy to say ' its not working out. sorry. all the best eh?'.

    Like all viral infections, prevention is better than cure. To avoid encounters with infected people
    -Never go on date with a guy whose only description you received from friends prior to the date is that ' he seems nice'. Hello! Serial killers are nice too. Find out something more concrete.
    -Internet dating seems to be the better way these days than the bar scene*shudder*, but beware of messages with obvious spelling/grammatical errors, too many exclamation marks(anything more than three can generally be taken as a sign of an insane mind), repeat proclamations of 'having a sense of humor' (hint- if he has any, he wouldn't need to type it out) and an attached picture that's atleast a decade old.

    But despite taking these precautions you might still come into contact with an infected person(with a dormant virus maybe), in which case your treatment options are to
    -stop all analysis of 'what he meant' with your girlfriends
    -accept that he is an 'emotional fukcer' that's all
    -delete all messages ever received as well as phone numbers
    -never ever respond to the cries of 'lets be friends' with a chirpy 'sure'
    -if possible, start dating his neighbour or better his boss

    So, be careful and may the dating pixies be with you (nothing like blue annoying flying buggers to keep things in perspective).